How can I encourage my peers that coaching is worth their time?
I’ve been working with a coach for 6 months now and I’ve learned a lot. But now, when I engage with other leaders (especially my peers on the leadership team), I find myself wishing that they were working on themselves too. How do I encourage them to work with a coach without offending them?
We hear you. It sounds like you’ve worked hard to improve your skills and would love to see others make a similar investment. The first step is to figure out what’s stopping them. In our experience, there are many barriers to engaging with a coach, including:
Blind Spots: It’s often said that the people who really need coaching are the least likely to receive it, because the people who need it most are those who don’t think they need it.
Overwhelm: Many people would love to work with a coach - if only they could find the time. For some who feel this way, coaching is just the thing they need to recover balance; for others, the overwhelm is temporarily unavoidable and it’s not the time to pile coaching on top of their heavy load.
Finances: It’s important to realize that professional coaching isn't always available at large. Just because you were able to receive coaching doesn’t mean that others have the support of their leadership - or their personal finances - to do so.
Each of these barriers (and many others not listed) represents a unique reality and thus a unique starting point for talking with your peers about coaching. Here’s how that might sound:
Start with gaining a deeper understanding: “I’ve gained so much from working with my coach. You’re facing a lot of the same challenges but I get the sense that coaching doesn’t appeal to you. Why not give it a try?”
<<Listen to understand and to empathize with the way they think and feel about coaching, then tailor your approach accordingly>>
If the barrier is a blind spot (e.g., your peer says something like, “I don’t think I need it - I’ve got it all under control.”), then consider being a source of truth. For example, you might say, “I know you have it under control, but I’m not sure you realize the impact that your approach is having on our overall success. Your team is extremely talented, and we need them to be collaborating more effectively..”
If the barrier is overwhelm (e.g., your peer says something like, “I’d love to work with a coach — I just don’t have time for that right now.”), then probe for a root cause of their overwhelm. For example, you might say, “I know it seems crazy to take on one more thing when your days are packed, but coaching might help you change that. What’s one thing that you’d need to do differently to free up time on your calendar?” Many times, this simple question helps people realize that they’re stuck in a self-propelled cycle, and the only way to break free is to figure out new ways of working. If not, don’t push it. You’ve planted a seed…water it here and there by sharing your positive experiences with coaching.
If the barrier is finances (e.g., your peer says something like, “I’d love to work with a coach but our training funds won’t support it.”), then offer encouragement and support. For example, you might offer to share an ROI analysis with whomever holds the pursestrings to influence greater adoption of coaching, or offer to ask your coach if they offer discounts for those who need to pay out of pocket.
Overall, the key to success is to seek to more deeply understand (don’t assume!) why your peer isn’t engaging with a coach. Bring empathy into the conversation by relating to their perspective and experience, then share your perspective and experience. Plant seeds of intrigue and hope, then give them space to grow.
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